167 – Sadness
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Welcome back to The David Madow Lifestyle Show. I’m Dr. Dave and this is the show where I help you live stronger, thinner, healthier, and happier. I’m going to give you a tip right at the start. We’re going to get right into this thing. I’ve got a lot of stuff for you today we’re going to try to cram in here.
My first tip to you is…can you tell that I’m smiling? You can probably tell that I’ve got a big smile on my face. You can’t see me but just from my voice. My tip to you is that whenever you are talking to somebody on the phone, smile. If you have a big smile on your face, it’s going to come through. As often as you can, just smile. You know it take fewer muscles to smile as it does to frown. It’s much better for you.
Be sure to follow my LIVE daily broadcasts on Periscope at www.periscope.tv/davidmadow.
I truly believe that smiling extends our life. I really do believe that. You can tell I’m smiling now because I am talking to you and I love you.
It’s a great day! I am walking in my outdoor studio. There’s actually snow on the ground here in Reisterstown, Maryland. It’s both snowy and icy. So I put these Yaktrax on my shoes. It’s these little cleats that you buy and you strap them over your shoes so you won’t slip. I use these for hiking all the time in Breckenridge, Colorado. Because you know when you’re hiking in the winter and there’s snow on the trail, one little slip and you’re in trouble. I bought these last year in Breckenridge and they’re really cool. You can strap them over any kind of shoe or boot.
Goals Course Questions & Feedback
I’ve got a bunch of stuff to talk to you about today so let’s get right into it guys and gals. I’m getting a lot of great feedback from my goals course that I had online. I’ve taken it down for a short time. I’m regrouping and after the 1st of the year, it’s probably going to come back up. But a lot of you are really getting into it and formulating your goals for the year. And seeing really positive changes already. But I’ve gotten a few messages from some of you that I just want to address. It seems like some people are getting a little bit stressed out because they are not seeing immediate gratification. They’re not sure if they’re goals are going to be working. Well, I’ve got some tips for you so that you can move forward with your goals and your dreams so that you realize that these things are going to work. But I have a couple of suggestions for you.
Number 1 when you’re formulating your goals, try your best to make your goals realistic. Let me back up for a second. You know I am one that believes in shooting for the stars and really reaching high and going for it. But I am asking you to make your goals somewhat realistic. I truly believe in reaching for the stars. But if your goals aren’t realistic or attainable, all it’s going to do is frustrate you and you’re going to stop.
I carry my book of goals with me every single day. Now I’ve kind of downsized my book and I carry a little pocket sized book with me everywhere I go. It’s in my back pocket or my backpack all the time with me. But I will talk more about reading your goals in a minute.
So for example, if one of my goals was to be a starting quarterback in the NFL. And I wrote that down and read it everyday. No matter how many times I read that, it ain’t happenin’! I am 61 1/2 years old. I’d like to think I am in really good shape and pretty strong but guess what? The NFL does not want me no matter what I do. No matter how much I work out, no matter how much I practice, the NFL does not want me. So my point is to make sure your goals are at least some attainable or possible. If not you’re going to get stressed out. They’re not going to work. You’re not going to see them become reality and you’re going to give up.
Secondly, some of you are telling me well, I know my instruction is to ready my goals once a day but if I read them 20 times a day they are going to happen faster. That’s not true. in fact, the more you read them every single day and they more you seem to be obsessed with them, it’s actually going to have a negative effect. We don’t want to obsess over our goals. We want to read them maybe twice a day at the most. And then let the universe do its work. The universe will figure out a way to make your goals become reality. But if it becomes the type of thing that is always on your mind, you’re reading them many times a day, you’re stressing out, and you’re obsessing; then that’s not what we want and they are not going to work. The universe will become confused and it’s not going going to give you what you want.
Like I said in my original instructions. Think about your goals, write them down, read them once per day. Don’t obsess over how they’re going to come true. Just read them. Through quantum physics, the universe, you’ll see them start to become reality. These things don’t happen overnight so I don’t want you to give up. I never want you to give up. You can edit, you can change, rearrange, things like that. I’m always changing, thinking, editing. But I don’t want you to give up. Don’t give up please.
So I hope that helps out. I just wanted to clear the air a little bit before I got into the main topic. Goals are really powerful. Goals are actually the way that I learned to live my life the way I am right now. My goal setting started probably about 25 years ago. And I never stop. They are really powerful. I am working on some goals right now.
One of my goals is Yoko and I moving to Colorado. I’ve got something written down about that. I read it every single day. It’s going to happen. I’m sure it’s going to happen. Our goal right now is to have it happen within the next 2-3 years. I’ll keep you informed and abreast of that as that’s unfolding. It’s kinda weird because as I have said as much as I love it here I’ve lived in Maryland all of my life. And I just think it’s time for a change. As much as I would probably hate to leave here it’s going to kinda open up a new chapter in my life. A new chapter, a good chapter, a chapter in the mountains. We’re just really excited about that. But part of me is going to miss this beautiful area that I live in right now. Let’s face it. I’ve lived here my whole life. I’ve got friends, family, connections, and all kinds of things. It’s going to be a little bit strange but we have decided that we do want to do this. Like I say to my Dad all the time, if not now, when? Sometimes you just have to go for something. Sometimes you just have to do it.
So I’ve been getting a lot of messaging from from a lot of folks and I am also seeing posts on Facebook and things like that and a lot of chatter online about many of you being sad, depressed, and blue. It seems like this time of year when the days are shorter, it’s cold, there’s not as much sun, that when we are in this season and this type of weather it’s very common to see many of you just feel a little bit down. A little bit sad. A little bit depressed. And if you’re one of them I am going to help you. And even if you’re not and you feel great every single day. Which I don’t think anybody feels great every single day! If you’re feeling sad, down, depressed, or even if you’re not, I’d like you to listen to this because I think some of the words I am going to give you might help you either way. They’re good for anybody really. Especially those of you that really feel like it’s not your time of year. There’s stress and there’s sadness and all kinds of things. I’m going to help you with a few little tips that are going to help you get through not only the holidays but they’re going to get you through the winter and into the spring when the grass gets green again. The flowers are blooming, it’s warm, and the birds are chirping. Everybody loves that time of the year, don’t they?! It’s a cool time of the year.
But I try to really love every part of the year, every day, every time. Whether the days are short, whether it’s long. Admittedly over the past few weeks, I’ve had some things. Work sometimes becomes stressful for me or there’s certain things going on. And here’s what I’ve learned to do to really help make my days and make my feelings really good.
Number 1, as you probably know I am a firm believer in eating a plant based diet. I have really seen an incredible change in my life since going vegan. I’ve been plant based for just about 3 years and what I’d say to people is that there is no turning back. There is no way. I’ve been on both sides of this. And there is no way I would ever go back to eating animal products ever again because it just doesn’t work for me. It worked for me for 50-some years or at least I thought it did. But when I go back and look at how my life was when I was eating animals and animal products, basically cut up carcasses on my plate. What I am eating now as far as fresh whole foods, organic foods from the earth. I think a lot of this has to do with when you are eating meat and animal products, you’re ingesting fear. Let’s face it!
If you are still eating animals, I still love you. I don’t have a list of friends that I like better because they’re eating vegan. If you’re listening to me and you’re looking to make your life better, trust me I love you! Whatever you’re doing, I love you. Let’s try to make your life as best as it possibly can be and if you take all my advice, that’s great; and if you take some of my advice, that’s fine. Do what you’re comfortable with. But I will tell you when there’s an animal that’s been suffering probably it’s entire life and then it goes off to slaughter and then you consume those cells. You’re consuming fright, fear, suffering, sadness. I truly believe that. I really really do. If you haven’t tried going totally vegan, totally plant based, I urge you to give it a try and see and feel the difference in your body. The way you look at every single day. Your emotions. I beg you to try and see the difference. Because there is a difference. And it’s not just me. Anybody that’s gone vegan or taken animal products out of their diet, out of their lives, and have learned to love the animals, they all say the same thing, they just feel better. So number 1 that is what I am going to recommend you try especially if you’re feeling a little bit down, sad, and blue this time of the year. I urge you to try it. There’s nothing you can lose. I think Donald Trump said something like this when he was campaigning, “things have been going on the same way this whole time. Vote for me. There’s nothing to lose at this point.” He was kind of right. [Dave laughs] We won’t get political. But it made sense. There’s nothing to lose.
That was not a political statement at all. Trust me it was not. When you are taking animal products out of your diet, there’s nothing to lose as far as trying it goes. It’s going to make you feel better. I promise you that.
Number 2, I am going to ask you to do what I am doing right now and I do it practically every single day. And that’s get out and experience the outdoors. Be one with nature. Put your feet firmly on this planet. Feel the difference. If you can do that “Magic 4” every day that’s really a plus. If you’re new to me the “Magic 4” means walking 4 miles every day on your feet on the earth. I really prefer to do it outside as opposed to a treadmill because there’s something about being outside in nature that is so different then being in a gym or in your home on a treadmill, or on a stair stepper, or on an elliptical or something like that. I’ve done it both ways. And the only time I really ever use my treadmill is if it’s really really inclement weather, like if it’s snowing, sleeting, and just freezing cold. That’s not fun for me. I would go on my treadmill instead or maybe I would take the day off. Right now I am outside. It’s cold, there’s snow, there’s ice on the ground. But let me tell you what I’m wearing because I truly believe being outside is better. I’ve got multiple layers on. I’ve got a pair of thermal underwear on that cover my legs. I’ve got a pair of heavy pants over that. I’ve got 2 t shirts and a shirt that goes over that and then a quilted flannel. So I’ve got multiple layers. And then I’ve got my jacket that I ski in. The more you layer the better it is. I’ve got a pair of gloves on, I’ve got a hat, and I’ve did I mention my socks, my shoes, and my cleats? So I am totally prepared for the weather. When you go out in weather like this and you’re in a short t-shirt, you’re gonna freeze. You not going to be comfortable. It’s not going to be fun! But quite honestly right now, even though it’s cold, icy, and snowy I could be out here for hours and not even feel like the weather is bothering me because I am dressed properly for the weather.
I’ve learned a lot of this from backpacking and from camping and quite honestly skiing and backpacking in Colorado. You learn what works and what doesn’t work. Sometimes it’s a little bit of trial and error but when you’re not prepared for bad weather, it’s going to kill ya. It’s going to be so uncomfortable. It’s just not going to be good.
So the third thing I am going to recommend that is going to help you with your life. It’s going to help you with your sadness or depression. Even if you’re not. I practice these things anyway. It’s meditation. As you know I am a firm believer in meditation. I meditate practically every single day. If I ever said I do something every day I would be lying because I am a human being like anybody else. And there are some days that I just miss. And that goes with the “Magic 4”. That goes with anything. It doesn’t go with eating. I never will eat meat. I never will eat animal products. So I never make an exception there. But if there’s a day that I just don’t feel like going out and doing the “Magic 4”, you know something? I don’t do it. I don’t stress myself over this. If there’s a day that I just, for some reason don’t want to meditate, I just don’t do it. And again, the day is going to be fine. But it seems like over the past couple months I’ve slipped out of the meditation habit. I wasn’t meditating nearly as much as I had been the past couple years. And I’ve gotta tell you something. I didn’t really think about it much but I started to feel a difference. I didn’t realize what it was and I started feeling a little anxious sometimes, I just didn’t feel right all the time. I thought about this and said you know, I can’t really change because I have not been meditating like I used to. So about a week ago, I made it a point to say that I was going to meditate for sure every single day without an exception. I am going to do at least 15 minutes. And what I have been doing in the past week or so as it turns out is that I have been meditating twice a day. In the morning for 15 minutes and sometime in the afternoon or evening for 15 minutes. And I swear to you I have noticed a huge difference in the way I feel every day. There really is a difference. Is it a scientific study? Could I swear it’s because of meditation? No! It’s not scientific, it’s more anecdotal. But it’s really coincidental isn’t it? As soon as I put meditation back into my routine, I started feeling not a little bit better but much better every day.
So I am going to highly recommend that you do the three things I just talked to you about. And meditation is truly truly a game changer.
Before I leave you today, I am just going to tell you how I do it. I sit down in a comfortable position. I turn on some meditative music. I close my eyes. Lately I have not been setting my timer because I actually play a song that is exactly 15 minutes. So when it’s over I know it’s over. I just sit there and listen to my music. I breathe in and I breathe out. And I try to concentrate on my music and my breathing. It really really works. And I am going to highly suggest that you have not been in the habit of meditating, I am going to ask that you give it a try. It is a game changer.
I think this went really well today. I apologize if you heard me crunching around the entire episode. I am crunching on hard packed snow and ice. And it’s a beautiful thing out here. I love it! I love nature! I love the outdoors!
I’m Dr. Dave and I will see you next week! Be good.
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